He's Home

 Yes, he's here!

Bandaged and bruised, but he's home. And I'll take it.

I don't think I was prepared for what was to come when Matt arrived home. I walked in and instantly gave him the biggest hug. Our time apart felt some much more distant as I saw that face again. It was the best feeling to see him. 

Most of his first night home looked like this...

 Matt telling us stories...some I could live without.

Showing us his awards, badges, and books.

Sharing his memories, friends and experiences.

I'm just glad my army brother is home.

Now it's back to this.

3, it's a magic number.

October, already?

I feel like the ride of life has taken up way too much of my writing time lately. My journal and blog have been put on the back burner and luckily I've had some time in the last two days to catch them up.

So, an update on me and what's going on...

Well first, I want you to meet someone...

Meet Marigrace Elizabeth Sublett.

My sister, Hannah, gave birth to this beautiful baby girl last Wednesday and life's been a bit crazy since. There were a few complications at her birth, so she's spent the last week in the NICU at East Tennessee Children's Hospital. She has definitely had some prayer warriors and only beacuse of the Lord, she'll be going home sometime this weekend! 

I can't believe Hannah and Chris have a baby, but she is already bringning so much joy into this world and I can't wait to get to know her. And spoil her rotten. I am already in love with those cheeks.

On another exciting note, my dear Army brother, Matt, will be returning home for good today. Long story short, he got injured and has been sent home. I have a lot of emotions swirling around concerning him. I can only trust the Lord with him and pray for him. I am happy he brought my little brother home, though. It's been a long two months, and I can't tell you how excited I am to see him. He even sent me this picture this morning to say I actually got to see him in his camo's.

How weird is this.

Oh well, he's still my brother no matter what. 

The last letter I got from him while he was gone told me about how my writing inspired him to write. He had enclosed another letter of his writings about his experiences in the Army and what he's learned and come away with. I'll publish it later with his permission, but I'm not the Henley who can write. 

 With all the family situations going on, I've been thankful for my friends and for being able to spend time with them fairly often. Life is just crazy, but I've learned that it's important to be thankful and important to be still. It's amazing what sitting in front of my computer can do for my sanity. All in all, God is sovereign and he reminds me of that often.

Time to catch up.

More coming soon.

September smiles

I can't believe that it's already September. Months go by and I find myself wondering where the days have gone. My world has been full of lots of change and a roller coaster of emotion, but there's been a lot that has left me smiling and enjoying little things I am thankful for....like...

Lunch dates with sweet girls...

letters from my brother...

gorgeous sunsets...

breakfast with my Dad...

my cute brother...

and drawings of my army brother by cousins. 

We've all got a lot to be thankful for...

you've just got to take the time to look around at what's in front of you.

Hasta Luego.

I woke up feeling like I just wanted to go back to sleep. Not because I wasn't rested, but because I didn't want to face what today held. My brother, Barton, got to the house, came into my room and made me get up. So we all got up and headed to breakfast. My parents drove separate so I sat in the backseat and my brothers drove us. I had the sudden urge to write him, which I couldn't believe I hadn't done so yet, but I scrambled for some scrap paper. I had just enough in my purse so I got to writing. I wrote out Psalm 91 and some personal thoughts, and away in to my pocket it went as we arrived to Cracker Barrel.

It was awkward sitting as a family of five having breakfast. I was incredibly over hearing my Dad talk about "how it's going to be" and seeing my Mom cry after every word Matt spoke. I started to eat and wondered why I wasn't overcome with emotion like that. I could have cried at the drop of the hat, but nothing was uncontrollable. It felt like it was just me being with my brothers, and my parents tagging along.

We finished up our meal, and to my surprise, both of my parents had things to do and ended up leaving. Barton had to go, too, so that left me and Matt. All along I wanted to be the one who took Matt, but never expected it to work out that way. We made a stop at his best friend's house, and then made our way to the Army office. As I parked I could feel the tears well up in my eyes, but I choked them back. Matt grabbed his stuff and told me he was excited. We talked some, and he said that he knows why I wasn't so upset. He began to explain that he realized that this is more of a "see you later" than a "goodbye" for us three. He said that we, as siblings, are so close that it's not really a sad time. Of course we'll miss him, but we'll keep in contact and share what's going on, and pick up right where we are together again. I think those words from him were comfort from the Lord. We hugged, and as he got of the car I handed him the crinkled note from my pocket. He smiled and said, "Great minds think alike."

As I watched him walk in that door, tears streamed down my face and I drove away. I cried the whole way home. When I parked I remembered the note he had handed me. I quickly pulled it out and opened as I read...

Abbey,

First I love you! You're an amazing sister and an amazing person.

It's funny, everyone asks me why I'm so different from other guys and I always answer "my sister." 

You've influenced me more than you'll ever know and thank you for never losing faith in me.

Thanks to you I'm closer to God, family and finally doing something meaningful.

I love you sis and I know you're gonna do amazing things!

And be a terrific mother and wife! 

I'm going to miss you and Bart so much but I'll be back before you know it.

Always praying for you Abbs!

Love always, 

Matt

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. -1 Peter 5:7

It warmed my heart to read those words. And happy that he wrote out that scripture...he knows I worry like crazy. I felt God just take a lot of worry and cares away in that moment. This whole situation is one God is using for so many things, but I know he's using this for something in mine especially. I'm already seeing some truth and wisdom and am excited to see what else God says.

It's not goodbye; it's see you later.

Army Strong & Gone

It baffles me how fast the last six months went by. I remember after my brother enlisted and he told me we had six months until he left. I remember thinking we had all the time in the world...and the next thing I know it's August.

I can't believe it's already time for him to leave. Church flew by this morning. Maybe because with every person I saw and every time someone asked me how I was I had to hold back tears. I went straight home as soon as I could. I knew he came home today after spending his last week with his friends in Knoxville. I was home cleaning, I heard the door open and heard "Abb?" I just smiled because I knew he was home. We had to get things in order for all the family to come over for his going away party, but I was looking forward to just being with him. We went to the store, grabbed some coffee and dinner and headed back to the house.

Before I knew it my house was full of family. Everywhere I looked there were tons of people. It was crazy but I loved how despite our differences we came together to support Matt.

Every branch of the military represented!

 I tried my hardest not to get upset. I tried to enjoy my family and the time we all were blessed to have with Matt. I walked into the kitchen and saw some sweet mementos that my Mom had laid out.

 There were pictures he had drawn as a child, younger pictures of him, and little things celebrating his joining the Army. I just stood there and it hit me.

My little brother, one of my best friends, is leaving tomorrow morning and even though I am sad and worried I must have faith and trust God. God will protect him and God will sustain him. God will get me through this. God will give us time to talk, see each other and communicate. God is bigger than my worries or distrust.

I kept looking at the table full of sweet memories, and at the end sat this:

 It's then that God captured my spirit in this situation. It seemed like he just whispered into my ear and told me that he was going to take care of my little brother. He reminded me of the special times we were blessed to have over the last few months and that our relationship will not suffer, but grow stronger through this difficult time. He told me that he has a great plan for Matt's life and I need to trust him to do what his word promises.

He reminded me that we are a family...

...and that my brother will always be my brother.

Now he's just army strong.

 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High

will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.

 I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,

my God, in whom I trust.”

For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler

and from the deadly pestilence.

He will cover you with his pinions,

and under his wings you will find refuge;

his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.

You will not fear the terror of the night,

nor the arrow that flies by day,

nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness

nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

A thousand may fall at your side,

ten thousand at your right hand,

but it will not come near you.

You will only look with your eyes

and see the recompense of the wicked.

Because you have made the Lord your dwelling place—

the Most High, who is my refuge—

no evil shall be allowed to befall you,

no plague come near your tent.

For he will command his angels concerning you

to guard you in all your ways.

On their hands they will bear you up,

lest you strike your foot against a stone.

You will tread on the lion and the adder;

the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot.

“Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;

I will protect him, because he knows my name.

When he calls to me, I will answer him

I will be with him in trouble;

I will rescue him and honor him.

With long life I will satisfy him

and show him my salvation.”

 Psalm 91

Little bro & life change.

I bet I have started 5 or 6 posts within the past week. My life has been a whirlwind of madness. With work, family and friends I haven't been able to get close to getting my emotions or thoughts straight. My journal has been consumed with it all but getting it all ready for open viewing is another story....but I think so of it is ready.

Almost two weeks ago my brother, Matt, came to me and said we needed to talk. I knew it had to be a big deal because anytime we have a serious conversation they usually begin that way. We sat down and he began telling me about his decision to go into the Army. My heart immediately sank but I quickly jumped into a moment of prayer. I listened to what he had to say along with his reasons and hopes, and God took over my worry and emotions. We talked through some things and I told him how I felt, but that ultimately I would support him and love him with whatever he decided.

This morning he left for a two day type of training to prepare him for basic training. I got up to get ready for work this morning and I had the biggest lump in my throat. Over the last year I have become a mother to my younger brothers and as I woke up I felt like I was losing something and this huge sense of worry and anxiety came over me. I closed my eyes, prayed and got a pen and paper out to do what I do best: write. I sat down and wrote Matt a letter. I told him how I felt, that I loved him and that no matter what I would always support him. I told him that I am constantly praying for God's will to be played out for his life and I am comforted knowing that God is in control of it and I don't have to worry. I left it for him and didn't hear from him until I called him to make sure he was up in time. A few minutes later he texted me and thanked me for everything and that he loved me more than I would ever know. I felt God's presence surround me and I didn't have to worry about him.

Earlier I received a phone call form him and he told me about his day. He told me of people he had met, paperwork he filled out and the intense day ahead of him. It was nice to talk to him and comfort him as he begins this journey.

Tomorrow my little brother of 21 years is being sworn in for the United States Army...whoa. Luckily my God is in control.